The Long Nights Ahead

[QueenKitten]

Jaggedfang - Windclan Warrior
Tagged: Swiftwing, Open

 A yawn escaped Jaggedfang as he left the warriors den. The sun was just peeking itself above the horizon casting the camp in a low but warming light. It wasn't a rare occurrence for Jaggedfang to be up this early, sleep had long since stopped being a friend to the tom. He stretched, letting out another yawn, before heading over to the fresh-kill pile. It was getting low. He'd see if he could get himself put on a hunting patrol when they were assigned. For now he turned from the prey and made his way over to a spot that was just starting to be touched by the sun.

 He laid down, stretching out, and began to groom his long fur. It had matted up some during the night. Jaggedfang couldn't remember what he had been dreaming but it wasn't pleasant. He'd awoken with a familiar sense of guilt, one which hadn't left since the night of the last gathering. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if he had someone to talk to about it. But he couldn't. He couldn't place that burden, that guilt upon anyone else. It was why he had been avoiding his sister. He knew if she asked he would crack and that was something he absolutely could not let happen. 

 The sun was dragging itself higher now, slowly brightening the camp more. Other were wakening from their slumber. Jaggedfang stayed where he was, watching as the camp came to life.

[grimm]

swiftwing took care to wake up early in the mornings. he didn't really care to sleep in, finding it bothersome when so much was still out in the world to see and to explore and to understand. the long legged tom slipped out of the den, finding that the previous night's rain had passed on and the fresh smell of rain and grass hit his nose in a very appealing way. lean muscle rippled under short dark fur, and the tom moved on in the semi-darkness of the camp. the sun was rising, and with it, his urge to bask in the warm rays it cast on the center of the camp.

his ears twitched, however, looking toward the sound of movement in the early morning, and found the tom, woken early, to be cleaning his fur. one ear twitching, swiftwing moved on toward him, an urge to speak rising within him at the lonesome cat. and he was lonesome. as air-headed and drifty as he was, swiftwing still could see that this tom kept away from his fellow clan mates, kept away from conversation, and walked with his own personal cloud about his head.

"an early morning, then?" his voice was soft, not exactly high in tone, but it was sort of whispery as if the entire clan would wake with his voice alone.

he peered down at the tom, amber eyes glowing like embers in the growing light. he seemed almost to appear from the darkness, steps soft and quiet on too long legs. He wasn't incredibly tall, he supposed to himself, but compared to his clan mates, he towered over them on legs that looked almost too thin to be on a cat. he blinked slowly at the tom, and sitting down beside him, tilted his head.

"are the fears not chasing you any longer? or have they chased you into the light?"

(he's very blunt, mind you, and i think a lot of cats might understand why he is like he is? so he's probably heard it mentioned among the others. )

[QueenKitten]

Jaggedfang- Windclan Warrior

  Jaggedfang looked up as a quiet whisper broke the morning's silence. Above him stood Swiftwing. Jaggedfang had never talked with the tom much. Even when the young tom had been more personable he wasn't a talkative kind of cat. Yellow eyes followed Swiftwing's movement as he sat down beside Jaggedfang, tall legs folding down to the younger cat's level.

 He shuddered and looked away when he mentioned his nightmares. It was both easier and harder not to talk about it. Jaggedfang remained silent for a beat or two. He didn't want to ignore his elder, but he wasn't sure he wanted to talk about it. 

 Finally he said."I find it's more that the fears follow me into the dark, or rather, they never left the light."

 He wondered if that made any sense. Sometimes these emotions didn't. Sometimes there were no words to accurately describe it. Maybe Swiftwing would leave. No sense in hanging around a melancholy tom who refused to let the past go.

[grimm]

the tom fell into the silence easily. despite what many would say about him, he had a wealth of patience. of course, considering he would up and leave a conversation without meaning, it didn't mean he had become impatient, more of that something else had taken his attentions away. he tipped his head up and up and up, looking up into the brightening sky, and waited.

he felt more then saw the shudder that came through the other cat, and he tilted his head sideways, taking the turned away face, and considering it. he twitched his whiskers, long like everything else about him, and adjusted his tail over his feet. the silence continued, and he wondered if the weather would hold well today.

"i find it's more that the fears follow me into the dark, or rather, they never left the light."

swiftwing sat, silent, and considered the words. he tasted them on his tongue, repeated them in his mind's empty space, and chewed the words. nightmares were born in darkness, fed by reality, and twisted by the mind's eye. however, what seemed to be troubling the tom more was the factor of reality creeping into his dreams, fears that were even brighter then the sun in that hidden world in jaggedfang's head.

"i see." he paused for his own beat, considering, and then, turned amber eyes onto jaggedfang, peering down at him. "they are snakes given wings in your head then. a truth made into something else."

he fell silent, heavy stare on the tom for a moment too long, almost as if searching for something, before he nodded his head, and turning his eyes away. they shut, seamed in the black fur of his face, and he sat, listening. he said nothing, the silence of the camp washing over them again. there was still a little while before the others would awake, swiftwing knew. they often slept outside of their dens, underneath the stars, however, with the previous night's rain, they had all gone inside, to take shelter from the water soaking their fur.

he hummed softly.

"yes, such things can have a heavy hold on a cat."he paused again, before opening his eyes and looking to jaggedfang. "but one has to learn to uncurl their back claws if they want to move their front claws forward."

he sat up and gave another soft hum, eyes turned up again to the skies.

"yes, one should keep moving. keeping one's tail planted on the ground; they'd never get any where."

[QueenKitten]

Jaggedfang- Windclan Warrior

 He should be used to the silence. Silence was his forte. This was unsettling. It was never others who had been silent, only him. And when the silence got to be too much they wandered off. But he hadn't stayed silent. Jaggedfang had responded, thinking that Swiftwing didn't understand. Now they were sitting in silence. Finally the elder tom spoke. Spoke and understood that there was a poison in him. Eating him from within. Swiftwing's gaze lingered, boring into Jaggedfang, but abruptly cut off as he looked away. He felt nervous, having someone else understand. At least a little better than the other cat in camp. 

 Then the dark brown tom spoke again and this time Jaggedfang bristiled. 


"yes, one should keep moving. keeping one's tail planted on the ground; they'd never get anywhere."


 His tail flicked with annoyance. He'd heard it before, from his sister, from his mentor, from others around camp. That he needed to move on. Let it go, let them go. He knew that. This wasn't some new revelation. But it wasn't that easy, his heart burned. If he had been there, maybe.... but he had just been an apprentice. A stupid kit who had stupidly fallen off the cliff at the gorge. And all he had to show for his parents death was broken fang and burning heart.

 "Thanks for the advice," Jaggedfang grumbled, tail flicking in agitation. Saying he needed to let go didn't help him figure out how to let go.

[grimm]

swiftwing shifted his stance where he sat, peering at the white clouds, puffy and soft as a kit's fur, floated by above their heads. he still wondered, ever since he was a kit, how they stayed up there, how the sky was blue, and why exactly the sun rose and fell as if it was running along a tunnel. he never really recieved proper answers from other cats, they didn't know either, and so, he was left to think and consider a question he knew would never be answered.

he waited, mildly interested to see what response he would get. he knew how cats reacted, how some grew confused, how others ignored him, and, simply, how they grew angry. he took another beat, watching the cloud disappear over the barrier of the camp, and then, finally, looked back down to the tom. what he found was the long-haired cat's tail flicked back and forth with an almost easy way of annoyance, and he tilted his head, curious.

"thanks for the advice."

swiftwing dipped his head into a slight nod, but said nothing. he watched that tail flick back and forth, watched it grow more agitated, and after a brief moment, he turned his body, so he was now facing the other cat, and looked down his nose at him, curiosity burning bright in his chest. he dipped his head down, bending his body forward, a long, shifting frame, and peered closely at jaggedfang, amber eyes lingering once again. he didn't move, still bent toward the other tom, when he decided to speak again.

"does a warrior forget his code?"

he stopped and waited, silent and listening, to wait for the obvious response, but he still stayed bent to the tom, in his personal orbit, his eyes wide and watchful, different from his usually half-lidded, dreamy look he wore.

[QueenKitten]

Jaggedfang - Windclan Warrior



Jaggedfang didn't look at the older tom as he shifted, leaning more into the fluffy warrior's personal space. He resolutely refused to acknowledge the other. The long he was around Swiftwing the more his annoyance grew. Maybe, if he was lucky, ignoring him would get the tall cat to leave him alone. It worked on most of the others. Thinking he was just being stubborn. Which, admittedly he was, but far be it from him to care what they thought. It was his life to live not theirs. Jaggedfang bristled with antsy anticipation, ready to fight whatever Swiftwing had to say.



"does a warrior forget his code?"



This caught him off guard. Jaggedfang broke and turned to look at the tom, confusion clear on his face. What in starclan's name did he mean? What kind of response was he suppose to give to that? Jaggedfang hesitated, not finding an answer in the other tom's face.



"Of course not," he replied, confusion and a need for clarity winning out over his hostilities.

[grimm]

those eyes that stared back were what he expected, all in all.

confusion, clear as the rising sun, brightened on the tom's face, and swiftwing could do nothing but continue staring, curiosity brimming in his eyes. he twitched his whiskers once at the long pause, at the hesitation, and then, listened.

"Of course not."

and there, at the crux of it all, was his answer.

the tom couldn't help the bright smile that pulled at his lips, and he pulled back to sit at his usual form. he nodded his head a few times, humming his appreciation of the proper answer, as if it was a serious and very hard question to answer, and he was proud, like a mentor of their apprentice, at the answer. he twitched his tail, uncurling it for a moment to sway back and forth, and then, curled up again, this time, from the other side.

"and there is your answer!" he purred easily.

he assumed the tom would be grateful of his question, of the returned answer, and that all would be right in the world once again. of course, as the moments continued on in silence, he looked back down at jaggedfang, and looking on at that blank confusion, swiftwing realized that he didn't understand what he was getting at. with a sudden huff of mild annoyance, he flicked an ear and tipped his head.

"a warrior does not forget his code, nor does a mother forget her kits, so what, or who, says that you must forget your family?"

he stated this as if it was the most simple thing in the world to understand. one does not forget something so important, such a thing was obvious, and he could only understand that many a cat had simply said to let go of his pain, let go of his memories, and such a thing would not do. if one did not know where he has been, where could one go when he was moving forward?